By The Anti-Blez on Sunday, July 31, 2005

Oakland, having won yet another series at home, looks to make it a clean sweep against the Tigers.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Saturday, July 30, 2005

Barry Zito won't win 20 games this season. Two months ago, he wasn't even on track to win half that many.

That could all change today as a resurgent Zito tries for his 10th victory.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Friday, July 29, 2005

Oakland takes on El Tigres, who are still fighting for a piece of the Wild Card action.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Thursday, July 28, 2005

Next to Jason Swindall, there's no other millionaire ballplayer on the Oakland roster that gets our goat as much as Eric "Chokey" Chavez. The T-shirt salesman goes on and on about how important Chavez is to the Oakland lineup, but we know the truth: Chavez is NOT clutch. And now, thanks to SignRickey, we have the numbers to prove it:

Right now he's hitting .279, but his average with runners in scoring position is .220, including 33 Ks in 118 ABs with RISP.

Broken down further:

--He's hitting .184 with a runner on 2B

--He's hitting .133 with runners on 1B and 3B

--He's hitting .182 with the bases loaded.

With 0 outs he's hitting .344, 1 out .277, and 2 outs .191 (no surprise there).

And while he led the AL in walks last season with 95, he's only walked 38 times this season (on pace for 61).

He's also struck out 89 times already this season (on pace for 143 whiffs), compaared to 99 K's for all of last season.

We think it's high time for Moron Macha to drop Chokey down a couple of spots in the lineup.

In fact, how about this lineup:

Kendall
Kotsay
Crosby
Johnson
Swisher
Chavez
Hatteberg
Payton
Ellis

We like that much more than having Chokey in the cleanup spot day after day, where he does very little cleaning up.

By The Anti-Blez on Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Last night's game was nothing less than May-serable.

Have we witnessed the Second Coming of the Pathetics?

Heaven forbid...

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Big chance for Oakland tonight. Both the Twinkies and the Anals have already lost their games.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Tuesday, July 26, 2005

My god, he really does look like a clown.

By The Anti-Blez on Monday, July 25, 2005

The A's are back home following a 6-1 road trip.

SignRickey is back home following a camping trip.

A winning combination?

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Sunday, July 24, 2005

Oakland--now just 1 game out of the Wild Card lead--tries to complete a four-game sweep of TexAss.

Toto, we're not in the month of May anymore...

By The Anti-Blez on Saturday, July 23, 2005

Jason Kendall, our favorite whipping boy, put a whole new "face" on his season last night. He's beginning to earn our respect. Now, can he--and the A's--fully win it?

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Friday, July 22, 2005

For the first time in a long time, we can't think of anything bad to say about the A's.

Well, nothing bad except that Keith Gimper is crap and Beano is still a moron for getting the guy.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Thursday, July 21, 2005

Oakland, which won 3 out of 4 games against the Rangers just a week ago, opens another four-game series against the same team.

Kenny "Camera Shy" Rogers takes the mound for TexAss. Apparently, Bud Selig's idea of punishment is to let the thug pitch twice against the A's before beginning to serve his suspension for a crime that would have landed just about anybody else in jail immediately. How nice.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Rubber game in the 3-game series against the Los Angeles Anals of Assaheim.

The Anals want to win this game. The A's HAVE to win this game.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Tuesday, July 19, 2005

What a matchup!

Rich Hard-on and the AAA's (just 5.5 games away from last place) versus Jarrod Ass-burn and the Anals (solidly in first place and 8.5 games ahead of the AAA's).

Overmatched? We shall see.

Let's Go AAA's!

(After last night's dismal performance, they are the AAA's again for at least tonight.)

By The Anti-Blez on Monday, July 18, 2005

Oakland begins a three-game set versus the Los Angeles Anals of Assaheim, a series that will ultimately determine whether the A's season has been salvaged or is offcially over.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Sunday, July 17, 2005

Before you begin to believe the Asslickin' hype that is pouring from the T-shirt salesman's mouth, consider this:

The A's are actually CLOSER to LAST PLACE (6 games) than they are to first place (7.5 games).

If they don't win today, we shall call them the AAA's again.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Saturday, July 16, 2005

If the Baseball Gods have any sense of justice, Kenny Rogers will get his ass handed to him today, and Oakland will move into second place.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Friday, July 15, 2005

Kenny Rogers represents all that is wrong with major-league baseball and its flawed leadership under Butt Seawig.

It's left up to Oakland to dish out the punishment.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Thursday, July 14, 2005

The A's hope to pick up where they left off before the All-Star break. If they win 3 out of 4 against the Rangers, Oakland can move into second place and into long-shot contention for the Wild Card. A split (or worse), they remain in third and we will have no choice but to relegate the team back to AAA status.

One refreshing change between "this" Oakland team and the one that played the first half of the season:

Byrnesy The Clown is GONE!

Oakland can once again enjoy a Retard Free Zone in the outfield.

Let's Go A's!

By The Anti-Blez on Tuesday, July 12, 2005

When I started this blog in early May, I very plainly described how I wanted Pathetics Nation to be a reverse-psychology/parody site, along the lines of the now-retired Bambino's Curse Red Sox site. I explained that I loved the A's, but couldn't stand the direction they were going, and that I felt it was time for Oakland fans to tell it like it is about the team's obscenely low payroll and the general manager's ridiculous "Moneyball Or Nothing" philosophy.

I made my announcement on the Asslickers Nation blog, where I had been a regular and well-respected participant in spirited discussions about the A's for the past couple of seasons.

But many members of that site felt I had betrayed the A's by launching Pathetics Nation. Many of them simply presumed that if I spoke negatively about the A's, I wasn't a "real" fan.

Then their guru, a T-shirt salesman, banned me from the site for having dared said "bad things" about the A's. That, of course, only convinced the guru's followers that I was indeed a "bad" person and not a "true" A's fan.

Well, guess what? My love of the team has only grown during the past two months, and my reverse psychology has been a tremendous success, with the A's playing 15 games over .500 since I launched Pathetics Nation.

You read that right: 15 games OVER .500!

So, I feel relieved and vindicated. I was right, and all the bandwagon fans at Asslickers Nation were wrong.

As they say in the T-shirt business--WEAR IT!

By The Anti-Blez on Sunday, July 10, 2005

With a victory today, the AAA's can become the A's again.

Let's Go AAA's! (A's?)

By The Anti-Blez on Saturday, July 09, 2005

For some reason, Chicago plays like ChicAAAgo when facing Oakland.

Here's hoping the trend continues.

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Friday, July 08, 2005

With 3 games to go before the All-Star break--all of them against the best team in baseball--Oakland will probably finish the first half 5 games under .500.

Look on the bright side. Since all but one of the triple-Athletics will be sitting at home during the break, they can use their spare time planning October golf vacations.

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Thursday, July 07, 2005

The AAA's continue to show they have what it takes to LOSE.

They have a LOSING RECORD.

Last night they managed to LOSE ANOTHER GAME IN THE AL WEST STANDINGS.

They also managed to LOSE ANOTHER GAME IN THE WILD-CARD RACE.

They will LOSE MARK KOTSAY WHEN BEANO TRADES HIM FOR TWO 7-ELEVEN CLERKS AND A SLURPEE TO BE NAMED LATER.

And they continue to LOSE THEIR REAL FANS.

By the end of the season, the only fans the AAA's will have left are the hirsute she-men who think the T-shirt salesman knows what the fuck he's talking about.

ASSLICKERS, YOU ARE BEANED AGAIN!

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Have the AAA's become the A's, or are they still simply the AAA's. Or worse, will they become the AA's again?

We'll know by the AAAll-Star Break.

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Tuesday, July 05, 2005

The second half of the season begins with an all-new look at Pathetics Nation.

Unfortunately, the Pathetics themselves have the same old look. Same mediocre players, same overrated GM, same minuscule payroll, same blind faith in Moneybawl, and same dumbass fans who think that that maybe, just maybe the team can win 20 games in a row and that'll put 'em right back in the Wild Card Race.

Whatever, asslickers.

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Monday, July 04, 2005

It's a shame that the AAA's aren't playing on this greatest of national holidays. Isn't July 4 supposed to be all about baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and mom?

Anyway, we're still having hot dogs (barbecued, of course) today. It's a nice warmup for the REAL barbecue that's gonna take place on August 13. Not only will there be barbecued food to enjoy at that event, but I'll finally get to meet the T-shirt salesman in person!

By The Anti-Blez on Sunday, July 03, 2005

Oakland will finish the first half of the 2005 season with a losing record. No ifs, ands or buts.

Blame it on Beano. His team stinks as bad as the T-shirt salesman's ass-licking tongue.

Let's Go AAA's!!!

By The Anti-Blez on Saturday, July 02, 2005

The AAA's are so close to the .500 mark that they can taste it.

To get there, they'll have to beat a team that is 28 games OVER .500.

Let's Go AAA's!

By The Anti-Blez on Friday, July 01, 2005

After a month of beating up on other AAA teams, Oakland welcomes a major-league club to town.

Can Oakland compete with the big boys?

Let's Go AAA's!